An ideal guide to assembling your personality by altering your habits.
It is rightly said that habits make or break a person. If you wish to understand why you're not doing something right, sometimes all you wish is to perform an analysis of your habits and consider altering them. Because sometimes it’s not about what you are doing, but more about how you are doing it! And that’s where your habits play a really important role.
'The 7 habits of Highly Effective People' could be a book that aims at providing its readers with the importance of character ethics and personality ethics. The author talks about the values of integrity, courage, a way of justice and most significantly, honesty. The book may be a discussion about the seven most essential habits that each individual must adopt to so as to measure a life which is more fulfilling.
Content of the book:
The author continues to require the readers through the journey of character development. He elaborates how the event of the character of a being ranges from the time of his birth to the years until he grows independent. the primary three habits demark the event one goes from dependence to independence. the following three habits describe intimately about interdependence while the ultimate seventh habit deals with the new self, that's renewal.
The book is extremely recommended for people of all ages. It also holds a record of getting over 25 million copies sold in about as many as 40 languages everywhere the globe.
About the Author:
Stephen R Covey, the author of the book, is thought to carry an MBA from the university. In his previous years of schooling, Covey also has studied Religious Education and Business Administration. it had been in his doctoral thesis that Covey stumbled on a contrast within the literature regarding self-help. His observations marked that the books post 1920’s focused highly on personality traits while those before that focused on character development. that's when the author put forth his belief about how a balance between the 2 is more essential than the 2 in isolation.
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This is a life-changing book and also the best habit-forming book. you need to really have patience and concentration to read this book and to know it completely.
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Author Stephen R Covey explains about how we see the planet that's our paradigm.
And how is the change in our paradigm can cause a change in our positive mental attitude(PMA) and human and Public Relationship?
Author gives many stories to elucidate the concept very clearly.
He tells that we want to measure a lifetime of integrity, to contribute & make a difference within the world and lift to the greatness that lies within each folks.
The Seven Habits are
1. Be Proactive.
2. Begin with the top in mind.
3. Put First Things First.
4. Think win-win.
5. First seek to grasp, then to be understood.
6. Synergize.
7. Sharpen the saw.
Be Proactive:
It is about taking responsibility and initiatives
I am what I'm today due to the alternatives I made yesterday.
Begin with the tip in mind:
It means we want to possess a goal for everything. it's a kind of vision. How we wish to work out in every aspect of our life like with spouse, family, money, work, friend pleasure, enemy.
Put First Things First:
Author divides our entire time into 4 quadrants.
Important and urgent-Q1
Important and not urgent-Q2
Not important and urgent-Q3
Not important and not urgent-Q4.
Important are goals kept within the Habit 2.
Think win-win
Author tells in every situation we want to consider the advantage of our self et al. how can an outcome be useful to all or any the partiers. It's innovative thinking.
First seek to know, then to be understood:
Stephen presses on the problem that first we want to know others their situation, feelings and thoughts then directly telling how we feel or what's our decision directly.
Most important of all the habits. It's most difficult to cultivate.
Synergize:
It means an entire is bigger than the sum of its parts.
The essence of synergy is to value differences- to respect them, to build on strengths & to complete weakness.
Synergies everywhere within the nature.
Sharpen the saw.
It deals with the four aspects of life.
Physical, mental, social/emotional, spiritual.
It's about preserving and enhancing the best asset you have got.
It's a quadrant 2 activity.
What's unique in this book:
1. The concept of character ethic and personality ethic.
2. The principles or laws are excellent. They are the foundation on which this book is written.
3. A broad definition of success.
4. Making us use our four 'unique human endowments' in solving our problems and even while reading this book.
5. There is logic/reason in everything covey says.
1. Covey says that he found startling contrast between the self-help literature before the 20th century and after the 20th century. He found that the literature before the 20th century concentrated more on the "character ethic" or the bottom (or the roots or the person's character or the private victory). In contrast, the literature after 20th century concentrated more on the "personality ethic" or manipulation tricks (or public victory or communication skills or quick fixes or bandaids). Personality ethic could also be required in some situations in life. But serving character through personality ethic is unacceptable. It doesn't really help. Just imagine trying to achieve a destination in India using maps of America. It doesn't work. He says you will be a positive thinker and think positively like "Well we are visiting reach the right destination. Be positive". Even then you do not reach the destination because obviously, the MAPS are incorrect. But as you're a positive thinker, whether or not you do not reach your destination, you will feel "Ok. Let me think positively that whatever god does or whatever happens to me is for my benefit only". But the matter therewith form of thinking is that ultimately you do not REACH YOUR DESTINATION.
2. There are, what covey calls, natural laws or principles that govern us. we've to measure in accordance with them.
Example:
Law- once you love anyone don't put any conditions for that love.
Exp- once you love someone unconditionally you encourage their natural growth process and provides them strength. If you attach conditions thereto love, the opposite person wants to prove that he matters as an individual independent of you. you set him during a reactive state.
3. Covey stresses that success in one area does not imply success in other areas too, as we board an interdependent reality. If success in one area is enough, you'd probably isolate yourself from the society and work on that. Can your high profile/salary job do something to your broken relationship in your marriage? He further gives what success really is.\
4. kith and kin possess four unique human endowments viz., self-awareness, imagination, conscience and independent will, which makes us truly unique. Even the foremost intelligent animals possess none of those.
Covey says you must strive for P/PC balance. The person producing results is termed production(P) and therefore the ability of that person to supply results is termed production capability (PC). If you concentrate more on P, you may get sick and be unfit for PC. On the opposite hand, if you concentrate an excessive amount of on PC, you'll get no work done.
5. This book isn't something which tells you that "do this and suddenly a light-weight will shine upon you and take you into... or do good, be good, let's spread the joy...Or do that and something miracle happens and prevent bla bla...". When Covey says something he means it. He follows it throughout the book.
Example 1: When your son doesn't consider what you said, you get him into your way of thinking through threatening or exploiting his vulnerabilities because you're smarter, stronger and (you think) you're RIGHT. you'll win. And what about the sentiments of your son? Convey says, there you stand at the centre of the debris of a shattered relationship, your son being outwardly submissive and inwardly suppressing feelings that might later are available in uglier ways. Instead, if you ask your son what his problem is and work on an answer that'd be beneficial to both of you would not it's nice? Afterall your son's well-being is your priority.
Example 2: what's right in any given situation? Because if you and somebody are in a conflict and if something you think that is correct to you, it may be wrong for the opposite person and the other way around. Here we've to travel for the win-win solution. Here, many folks think "if he wins, I lose. Life could be a competitive race". the very fact is that it's not so. Only 'very few' areas in life are like that. the particular problem is 'your scarcity mentality'.
→Suggestions for people who decided to read this book:
1. Don't read this book in one go. Take at least every week break after studying one habit and apply it in your college/work in your interaction with others.
2. the primary pages (till habit 1 starting) is somewhat boring for beginners. do not feel your money is wasted after reading some pages. Hold on.
3. Trust those universal principles. Don't ever doubt them.
4. Repeat reading this book as persistently as possible and that I bet when you may discover something new. The principles are highly practical that you just may start applying them from day-1 itself.
My experience:
When I was reading this book, I could hardly watch for per week because each habit filled me with energy and curiosity for further habits to return. Several positive things happened in my life after I started applying these principles. I became friend with my enemies. I got new friends. Started being rather more mature in my relations. Started taking academics seriously. Just to offer you an example, one among my old friends with whom I had a breach, later being friends again after two years said: "You know, you have got changed a lot! ".
→Final words:
If you have got any problem in life, the book is worth reading because you're worth it! See most of the issues in your life. you've got no ill intention towards anyone or anything. you are trying to be as perfect as possible. In spite of all this, you'll have problems. People hurt you. they only don't understand you. the issues aren't because the opposite person is wrong otherwise you are right. it's just that you simply haven't got sufficient knowledge to handle yourself et al. Ignorance is okay but not willing to come back out of it's not.
HAPPY READING!
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